Gypsy soul

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I’ve always gotten so easily bored, I never understood why I kept wanting and wondering.

Because of circumstances in my life I was unable to travel the way I wanted to but there were different parts of the world that call my name.

More so the Southwest, Vegas, places that I’ve never seen before  and of course it’s hard when you have small children and you’re grounded because of school because of their friends their life you just can’t get up  And go. You have responsibilities we have kids. And as much as a single mother would like to take her children everywhere that her heart desires on these road trips to other countries it’s hard. And this is not the woe is me factor this is the reality of it.

I’ve wondered too why so many things I do are so in the moment impulsive spontaneous as if I’m just like a free person ,free spirit. My love for love everything beautiful. My Passion to be just free just to be who I am. That wondering that wandering its endless.

I really dont care about what other people think except from my kids. In relationships I can never be told what to do ..ever.  When I’m dating or in a relationship I can’t have that other person  Give a    Hint that they are telling me what to do because it turns me off.

Sometimes in relationships and dating I easily get bored. It’s more so easily turned off because I don’t like being told what to do, I don’t like being asked what time im  coming home ,I don’t like any of that period I don’t like people checking in on me and expecting me to tell them my whereabouts I’ve never been like this and I never will be.

And I feel as though my soul needs to be constantly awoken stimulated happy free. I feel like a constantly have to be on the move doing something creating, poetry, writing, art.

I need inspiration I need someone to inspire me sometimes and when I feel that I’m not getting that of someone there comes the gypsy soul and I feel it’s time for me to go.



Mamma Bear Syndrome

tilt shift lens photography of woman wearing red sweater and white skirt while holding a boy wearing white and black crew neck shirt and blue denim short
Photo by Nicholas Githiri on


Nothing fazed me At 1 point in my Life. The world will burn and I would somehow salvage myself and be OK. People on the street  act like idiots and nothing bother me nothing anybody could do could touch me.
Of course growing up in the hood I learned to defend myself always especially when you live in a city with a lot of chaos, And a bunch of madness you learn to adapt. You learn to ignore certain things and just carry on.
But once I had my 1st child it was almost like a demon possessed my soul. No one can say anything bout about her no 1 can harm her in any way. All I wanted to do was to protect her to stand by her side hawk her all day all night and make sure she’s OK.
Those 1st school years were tough bullies, tears rejection all that I wanted to just fix on my own but the best thing that I could do was let her figure it out so she can learn.
Whenever anyone messed with her this ferocious non stop of a beast of a mother came out in me. I noticed other moms are calm and they let stuff just roll over their shoulder when someone messes with their kid. To this day I still don’t understand how?
And I let her learn her own lessons she’s inde independent and fends for herself. But when she’s not in my presence and it’s something involving her that I have to fight for her I come out of this shell, And I am awaken like someone waking a dragon from a long sleep. And I feel like I get this Newly found energy from deep within my soul to just keep fighting for  , protecting her now and always.

Is this because I’m a single mother? I don’t hear about papa bear syndrome.
And I love mama bear’s. I love with these dine for I love that they love their children with a love beyond love and protection and admiration.
My children are the loves of my life and I live for them and I have diagnosed myself with …mama bear syndrome. And I don’t need any medication for this, I’m good


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Anticipation…the want…the wait

Knowing I will see you like it’s our first date
The comfort, the smile..the feeling that’s right
The conversations, the vibe..
The long slow sweet kiss goodnight

How i dont want that feeling to disappear…not knowing what is near

The excitement, the heat, the feeling of wonder happening to me

Longing to deserve this ..only a long awaited prince for me now

After I’ve kissed a few toads and laughed at so many lies

I will live in this moment..just him, me and these butterflies


grayscale photo of a boy aiming toy gun selective focus photography
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It has become all too much commonly heard.

A lot of people saying this happens in the world parts of the country but no, this is New York City.
You don’t hear about this in New York City but here it is!!

And for some reason it’s being kept so quiet

Lockdown drills and safety protocols are a day-to-day conversation that schools must have along with regular curriculum.

We have all remembered Colombine,Sandy Hook, Florida massacres along with many others. We will ever forget!

Last week was a school shooter threatened my children’s school.

Some kid in the school posted on social media that he was going to schoolkids in the school.

The school sent out a very vague email to parents informing parents that they are aware that children are texting their parents and the school has things under control in their following regular protocol.

I had no idea as to what was going on because I didn’t receive a text from my child just yet.

When I did communicate with my children they did tell me as to what was going on and they were very scared.

I Franticly raced to the school from my job that is an hour away commute. I actually got to the school within 22 minutes. I guess I can expect some red light tickets in the mail.

The line of the school wrapped around the corner with parents waiting to pick up their children.

My children kept texting me and asking me to please pick them up.

I don’t think I have ever been that scared in my entire life.

Not knowing any answers -if the school shooter is inside the school did they get this person? What’s going on? Are you safe? Is there a lock down drill?

When I called the school the phone just rang no answer.

After speaking with a few other parents I’ve learned experienced the same.

The process in order to pick up my child was a disgrace they need to come up with a better crisis system.
The bigger disgrace is that there was not a lock down drill on that day.

The school wasn’t 100% sure who this person was and if they had any guns in the school. I feel like they don’t take this seriously.

I finally picked up , hugged them as tight as I can.

Not only was this handled poorly by the school but now my children are in fear of the shooter because he is under 18 years old and he is still in the school receiving his education when my children were absent in fear.

Police say that this is under investigation. I don’t feel settled at all with these answers that we received from the school or from the police.

How is it possible for this kid to be allowed in the school?

The school is following these protocols and these procedures by Law.. but this is when things happen when there’s no action immediately by law forces, by principles ,by teachers this needs to be resolved now.

We need to pray every single day for the safety of all of our children all across the country all across the world going to school this is a sad sad sick societee that we live in now.

If anyone out there has information on how to proceed in a better way with this situation please feel free to write me
Please leave your thoughts your comments any suggestions your feelings Please leave your comments in the comment section

At what age do we allow our children to start dating?

My mother Was extremely overbearing And Extremely ridiculous ad being over protective when it came to me even being around boys.

It was so sad that when finally I was able to be old enough and be around boys I didn’t even know how to Interact with boys.

It’s important that you child has friends of the opposite sex.

Nowadays there’s not just 1 or 2 kind of sex so I guess its important for everyone of every sex to be friends to know how to interact with one another because that’s the normalcy in today’s world.

My mother was so strict and she didn’t want me around any boys she didn’t want me to have a boyfriend. I was about 20 years old when I had my 1st real boyfriend. I introduced to my mother and when out on dates with. He was the one that I married because my mother believed from her old customs that you marry the 1 that you’re with period …of course I had boyfriends before that but I couldn’t tell my mother because she wasn’t the kind of person you would speak to ,she wasn’t at all understanding.

Now that I’m a mother I try as hard as I can to have that understanding between me and my children. Its very hard when it comes to when you will allow your child to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And how do we exactly know when the time is right?

It all depends on the maturity level of that child for me ,I think anything below 15 is an absolute no.!!But there are people who allow their 14 year olds today and they allow their 14 year olds to even have sex. I can’t judge these parents because in one way these kids are gonna do it whether or not parents allow it. Hormones are hormones we were all that age at 1 point in our lives

As for me I always thought that when my daughter was a senior in high school I would let her date very innocently to the movies and things like that . I didn’t picture her at all having a boyfriend. Now that she’s 16 and she has someone that she really likes who’s an amazing kid my views have changed.

So I really do believe that all depends on the circumstance the situation ,what we teach our children and how the significant other personality really is .

I don’t agree with anyone below 17 having sex but that is me I’m very old school .I know call me close minded but I think it’s so early and I think they have so much of a life to look forward to and they have plenty of time to have sex but as I said before hormones hormones and yes I do understand it not that I agree with it but it’s gonna happen if it’s gonna happen it’s gonna happen!!!!!

A decent age to have a boyfriend that you can hang out with and typically technically call your boyfriend? For me although I don’t like putting a number on it and I still kind of think that 16 is a bit young I would say on average 16 would be an acceptable age to have the boyfriend or girlfriend.

What do you think would be a good age? What do you think would be a good determination on whether or not your teenager should even have a boyfriend or girlfriend?

What we need to do as parents is be parents 1st -friends 2nd and make sure that we know their whereabouts and we know who they’re hanging out with what they’re doing .we have to build that trust. We have to build a strong independent honest loyal good child and all the rest will follow in its place. We have to teach them to make wise choices.

Did I mention communication???

I don’t know if I could win mother of the year but I’m trying just as hard as the next mom is trying to keep her child safe ,loved and protected.
I feel very alone in this I don’t know many teenage moms and I would love to hear your opinions and what you think .
Should and being the right time for a teenager to begin dating.


photography of people using smartphones
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We see this all the time pictures of people that are posting up their vacations, their new cars, Posting pictures of them every single place that they go with a smile. And they take a lot of pictures while you’re out having a great time with your friends and your family your stopping every every couple of minutes ,you’re taking pictures right then and there and you’re putting them on social media.

Just explain to me how exactly you’re enjoying the The moment that you are in?
I have a friend that takes pictures of the meal she’s about to eat, of us when we sit down to eat it ,of us when we were walking to where we have to go .In an hour of being with her she must have taken at least 10 pictures and posted them on her social media page. In the middle of each conversation we were having it was kind of annoying for her to say ” wait..hold on let me get a pic really quick”. And even though I did have a nice time with her it took away from well basically anything we’re talking .

I understand Facebook is great for sharing your activities with your friends and family who are also with you and those who are far away anyone a way to communicate with them all the time …I get it. Then you have the show offs. Do I really need to know the you have a 6 bedroom house? And when you’re posting these pictures on Facebook while you are in Italy do I really need to know? Not that I’m gonna go breaking into your house ..but may be somebody else will?
I see hashtags#Ilovemylife#I am blessed#thisisthelife. If you love your life so much why do you need to remind yourself and remind everyone around you? I mean, It’s kind of silly don’t you think? To me when I see people doing this it’s almost like they’re showing off to somebody and they want to send a message to somebody that may be they let go in the past or they want to send the message to somebody to let them know how wonderful and successful they are now and they’re reading all of this nonsense.

Another thing I see a lot of on social media are relationships that are Like snow white and Prince charming on Facebook. I see these couples kissing, holding hands, traveling, celebrating anniversaries, going out to dinner, but the reality of a lot of these cases are not what they appear to be. For instance I have this one friend who completely hates her husband and she is constantly calling and texting me telling me all of his faults and she tells this to other people as well but on Facebook they are the happiest couple ever. She’s in the process of talking to a divorce lawyer but on social media she writes things like how much she loves him and how people thought they will never stay together this long… She’s even talked to me about moving to another country to get away from him so why put up a persona of something that you’re not?
I’m not saying that everyone on social media does this but the fact that people are doing this and we know what’s really going on it’s a bit disturbing makes me wonder how real that person is and makes me really think about why on Earth are they being so fake? If you want people to think that your life is absolutely superb and wonderful then just stay off of social media and let people wonder don’t write a bunch of lies and bull shit on there because it makes you look really silly when there are people out there who know the real you.

Another woman on social media puts pictures of her and her family under vacations. It’s great that she’s on vacation But when her house is broken into my summer and investigation determined add it was Facebook related.
It’s almost like a popularity contest in high school to see who has the most friends and who goes the most places and who has more and  travels and whose life is better whose life is more blessed.

I’m very private on social media and I don’t put those things up.. I do put a couple of things here and there but I like keeping to myself.  I don’t put every sum of things I do on social media.
Social media is a wonderful amazing thing to utilize its just funny to see The purpose that some people use it for

Why do you know this this about the fakeness on social media?



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Photo by Kat Jayne on

Overbearing mothers ,a blessing and a curse. You love them and appreciate them but sometimes they have no sense of boundries.
You Try to make them Happy with everything you do. Everything you have done. Every move you have made in your existence was to make them happy. Yet, Still they’re never satisfied. It’s because they can never be, never will be satisfied with anything that you do.

My mother was so overbearing and protective, So over protective that she  Did not allow me- a college graduate to leave the house until I was married.

And I really wanted to leave that house so of course, I was in love what do I do?

It’s completely sad how a mother can dictate a child’s life even as an adult. It’s a not so rare form of mental abuse that exists in so many more people then admitted. Abused as children abused as Adults when does this abuse end?

Is your mother overbearing? Is that a form of abuse? Is it OK for her to tell you how to raise your children? Is it OK for her to tell you to come on by 10:00 p.m. when you 25? Is it OK for her to choose your career in your life? what you gonna do? what path you’re gonna live? Who you gonna love?

Is this not abuse? There’s A-line that a mother should not cross. A mother will always be a mother, a mother will always see her babies as her babies.

But these children do grow up and fall in love have families of their own and this overbearing mother can contribute and be part of the family but when it gets to the point that she’s dictating your life when you’ve already established your own life there’s a huge problem.

It’s an abuse it’s not knowing when to stop. And of course we love our parents unconditionally no matter what kind of crazy shit they have put us through. We all want our mommies and our daddy’s, we wanna be loved and there are times yes we want to be children again.

What if your mother had the keys to your house and she can come in whenever she feels that she wants to? However, you have given her these keys to come to your house if there is an emergency or you need help with something. These emergency set of keys isnot for your mother to come in walking to your house whenever she pleases. What if you are their intimate with someone? what if you’re walking around naked? What if you just wanna be alone and you don’t want her to do this? Is it wrong?

It’s your mother being overbearing and it’s your mother letting you know that she still has control over your life as an adult. Your babies will always be your babies but you have to let your babies make decisions and grow and you have to learn to give them space. If not they’re gonna grow up and resent you for it in find a place to vent where the world can possibly listen